December 2016

Question of the Week:

My 4½ year old ignores my requests (to get dressed, to come when called, to get shoes on) yet she expects me to honor her requests (for immediate attention, snacks, music in the car). SOS!

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The 4-year-old tore open a Christmas gift from his Grandma. Realizing it was a pair of pajamas, he screamed "No! I don't want any stupid clothes!" and threw the PJs onto the floor. The problem? Grandma was sitting in the room.

"I can still remember this scene when it happened," says Dr. Phelan, psychologist and author of several parenting books, including 1-2-3 Magic: Effective Discipline for Children 2-12. The gift giver was Phelan's mother and the rude recipient was his son, now 41. "The incident shocked me, and it probably almost killed her."

The family all survived that Christmas, but the episode may have something to do with Phelan's attitude to this day. "Big Christmas get-togethers can be a bit of a chore," he says.