When it comes to parenting, you have three main jobs: stopping obnoxious behavior, encouraging good behavior, and bonding with your kids! Today we’re talking about parenting job number three.
So how do you bond with your kids? What are the things that can get in the way? And what are some great strategies for bonding with kids at any age?
In this video Dr. Phelan discusses:
- What the three parenting jobs are
- Three great strategies for bonding
- One thing NOT to do
How the Three Parenting Jobs Work Together
Parenting Job #1 is controlling obnoxious behavior: things like whining, badgering, tantrums, etc. Parenting Job #2 is encouraging good behavior: things like doing homework, eating dinner, getting up and out in the morning and getting ready for bed at night. Parenting job #3 is building a strong relationship with your kids: this is the fun one!
And the fact of the matter is, when you've got parenting jobs 1 and 2 figured out, building a strong relationship with your kids comes much more easily--because you're not spending your time getting frustrated with them!
Strategies For Bonding
You want to create a strong relationship with your kids, but how exactly do you do that? Dr. Phelan shares three powerhouse strategies and speaks to each one:
1. Sympathetic Listening - Nothing makes a child (or anyone) feel more connected than knowing someone is really listening to what they have to say.
2. Shared Problem Solving - Put yourself on the same team with your kids by working to solve problems together, whether it's a project that needs to be done or what to have for dinner.
3. One-on-One Time - Doing things together as a family is nice, but one-on-one interaction is where the real magic happens.
Hopefully this advice on encouraging good behavior is helpful! If you need more help with challenges like these 1-2-3 Magic is a great resource. We also have an on-demand seminar on Bonding with Your Kids: 4 "Magic" Strategies that you can watch and start using right away.