1-2-3 Magic: Parenting Tips
Manager Mom Syndrome: a phenomenon in which the mother's supervision, direction, and monitoring are seen as constantly essential for a smoothly running home. In this scenario, Mom is Family President, Chief Servant, and First Responder.
The goal of Manager Mom is to get the work done now and to get it done right. Unfortunately, this agenda has several negative consequences. First, children are seen as a series of daily jobs that need to get done—rather than as people to be enjoyed—and their independence is squashed. Second, Dad falls into the role of Mom's "helper," but he is often perceived as not carrying his load with regard to childcare and household tasks. And third, Manager Mom Syndrome often means that Mom feels overwhelmed.
According to Dr. Thomas W. Phelan, the solution to Firing Manager Mom is to change our basic family model. Read on to find out how you can accomplish this in your own home.
Before they had kids, most couples dreamed of what they hoped their family life would be like. They imagined pleasant scenes of family togetherness, warmth and joy. Then, along came ADHD. These visions of interpersonal heaven did not materialize often, and when they did, they were frequently marred by anticipatory anxiety and angry explosions. But positive interactions between family members are possible, just usually not when the whole family is together. Learn about the Divide and Conquer Routine and how it can help your family.
If you ask any parent in this country today if they want to enjoy their children, they will look at you as if you're crazy. "Enjoy my own kids? Of course I want to enjoy them. I love my kids. They're only going to be living with me for a short time."
These comments reflect parents' appreciation of their children as small, precious creatures who can be incredibly cute and adorable. But if you've been a parent for any length of time, you know these priceless little beings can also be incredibly difficult. They can whine, tantrum, and tease their sibs; they can refuse to eat, do their homework, pick up, or stay in bed. At these times, you still love your children, but they are definitely not enjoyable to be with.
This is especially true of strong-willed kids. Strong-willed children take the battle to you and will severely test you to see if you know what you're doing!
It's that time of year again! The little ones—and those who are not so little anymore—will soon be heading back to school. Read on for a few suggestions for teachers and parents to manage this exciting transition.
Do you enjoy being the family nag? I’m sure you don’t. However, in most American families, an unwitting conspiracy involving children, mothers, and fathers too often produces a condition known as the Manager Mom phenomenon. Manager Mom means that a mother’s supervision, direction, and monitoring are seen (by everyone in the family, including Mom!) as constantly essential for a smoothly running home.
How can we get the kids to help relieve Manager Mom? My theory is that parenting strategies that help with the Big Three—(1) family bonding, (2) kids’ independence, and (3) the division of labor around the house—will help eradicate Manager Mom syndrome.