Should You Be Keeping Score? The Equal Suffering Law

Should You Be Keeping Score? The Equal Suffering Law

Should You Be Keeping Score? The Equal Suffering Law

Dr. Phelan says, "Over the years, whenever I've mentioned the Equal Suffering Law at parenting seminars, I always get the same response: knowing looks, subdued laughter, and some scattered, sheepish expressions--usually from the men. I used to think I would have to explain the concept, but it seems the audience was always one step ahead of me.

The Equal Suffering Law applies to all families, and it's as old as the hills:

In any meaningful and relatively permanent group, people should work or contribute equally to the extent that they are able.

Equal Suffering Law violations are a huge issue in many marriages, causing resentment between Mom and Dad."

"Keeping score" has a lot of negative connotations - but is it something we need to be doing?

Today we're talking about the Equal Suffering Law, what it means for you at home, and how it's actually not a bad thing!

In this week's video, Dr. Phelan covers:

  • How things have changed in our homes in the last 40 years
  • The 3 major categories of work parents are doing at home
  • The things contributing to the work imbalance
  • What you can do about it, and why it's so important
August 21, 2020
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